i don't even know what to say, i'm just so complicated.  but so are you so i guess it's fair.  i really want to talk to you but if i start everything how am i supposed to know you're interested?  i can't tell because you're so shy.  so maybe i was right.  or maybe i was wrong.  but either way this isn't going to work without a little effort from you.

but i just like you so much.

mood: sore

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures
And overanalyze your words
But the truth is that I've never fallen so hard
It's taking everything in me
Just to forget your sweater so far

Wondering how I could get so deep
And you can still get to sleep
In vain I blame my trembling on the cold air
And I can't hide that I relied on you

Cheer up my friends all say...
And I can't stop pretending
That you're forever mine
…You're better alone anyways

 
Every friend we ever had in common
I will sever the tie with you
You can thank your lucky stars
That everything I wish for will never come true

Your remorse hasn't fallen on deaf ears
Rather ones that just don't care
Because I know
That you're in between arms somewhere
Next to heartbeats
Where you shouldn't dare sleep
I'll teach you a lesson
For keeping secrets from me

Consider this song a testament
Of my devotion to your saccharine scent
And to be completely honest
You're not like all the rest
You're not like all the rest

She prays for days
When boys mean she's protected
And she wants someone to see her
She needs to hear she's beautiful
She's beautiful

These dreams we've had
Have never made you cry
And I am not a twinkle in your eye
But I've got to get out of here

And he can't understand
How everyone goes on breathing when true love ends
His mother whispers quietly...
Heaven's not a place that you go when you die
It's that moment in life when you actually feel alive
So live for the moment
And take this advice, live by every word
Love is just a hoax so forget anything that you have heard
And live for the moment now

But this time I’m alone,

And I don't see those stars
I'm not your star?
Isn't that what you said?

mood: emotional

I've had so many chances
Turn my back and I ran away
I've had so many chances to see you

Don't tell me it's not worth trying for
You can't tell me it's not worth dying for you

And you're, you're not here
And I can't stop pretending
That you're forever mine

You think you're on top of the world
When all the eyes are on you
Just wait until your heart breaks
And you'll know how I felt

I’m drunk off your kiss
For another night in a row
This is becoming too routine for me
But I did not mean to lead you on

No matter how happy you are
you'll always want more
no matter how stupid I get
you'll always want more

I've been waiting for a good day
I've been holding back long enough
I've been hurting to tell you some things
it's not the falling of the temperature
that's making all our bones run cold
it's the breeze you make
the presence felt when you're around me

Can you tell
that I'm losing myself
I think I'm trying too hard to
let it show
to let you know
don't trace your footsteps back to me

You’re hiding something, ‘cause it’s burning through your eyes
I try to get it out, but all I hear from you are lies

In the bright of day it might seem like the stars are gone

They never leave,
they come back when the sun moves on

It’s over now

mood: whatever

Ya know your kisses seem to set me free
(It's like wow)
Cuz when we touchIt's such a rush
I can't get enough
It's like, it's like wow</font>

Sick and tired of this world
There's no more air
Trippin' over myself
Goin' nowhere

I am your mirror image,
I'm all you left behind
You made me what I am,
Then who the hell am I?

Another head aches, another heart breaks
I am so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection, no no no no

So I wait for fate to find me
A ball of string unwind me
Uncomfortable as a centerfold

So don't be a liar,
don't say that "everything's working"
when everything's broken.
And you smile like a saint
but you curse like a sailor
and your eyes say the joke's on me.

I stand in your doorway
Your world looks so enchanting
And all I have to offer you is this
Just a stupid little love song

(It's a long wait) is there anything
(For an answer) worth looking for
(Is there any news) worth loving for
(Is there any word) worth lying for
(Is there trauma) is there anything
(Or a struggle) worth waiting for
(Am I missing) worth living for
(Was the body found) worth dying for

I'm wasted by the way she moves
No one ever looked so fine
She reminds me that a woman only got one thing on her mind

Black and white picture of her on my wall
I waited for her call, she always kept me waiting
And if I ever got another chance I'd still ask her to dance
Because she kept me waiting

mood: crushed

For your veiwing pleasure I have chosen 4 songs that I have placed in separate entries.  Much easier to read.  These all have extreme importance right now, so IM me and ask if you wanna know what the importance is. *sigh*

I used to think
I had the answers to everything
But now I know
Life doesn't always
Go my way, yeah...
Feels like I'm caught in the middle
That's when I realize...

[Chorus]
I'm not a girl
Not yet a woman
All I need is time
A moment that is mine
While I'm in between

[Verse 2]
I'm not a girl
There is no need to protect me
Its time that I
Learn to face up to this on my own
I've seen so much more than you know now
Don't tell me to shut my eyes

I'm not a girl
Not yet a woman
All I need is time
A moment that is mine
While I'm in between

I'm not a girl
But if you look at me closely
You will see it my eyes
This girl will always find
Her way

I'm not a girl
(I'm not a girl don't tell me what to believe)
Not Yet a woman
(I'm just tryin to find the woman in me, yeah)
All I need is time (All I need)
A moment that is mine (That is mine)
While I'm in between

I'm not a girl
Not yet a woman
All I need is time (is All I need)
A moment that is mine
While I'm in between

I'm not a girl
Not yet a woman
~Britney Spears - Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman

mood: crushed

For your veiwing pleasure, #2!

Tell me who should I be to make you love me?
Tell me what does it mean to be alone?
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance,
Hear my cry if you'd only listen...
Out of focus, into me and you

Kiss me fool, if you care
If your words have any meaning.
Playing it cool is so unfair
Why this veil of secrecy?
God forbid, your friends found out what we did
Why can't someone like you be someone like me?

Tell me who should I be to make you love me?
Tell me what does it mean to be alone?
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance,
Hear my cry if you'd only listen...
Out of focus, into me and you

Touch me fool, if you’re allowed.
I'll be dancing in the corner
It's so cruel to play it proud, take your hands and cover me.
I'm aware that all in love is fair, but that's no reason to make me feel this way.

Tell me who should I be to make you love me?
Tell me what does it mean to be alone?
Can't you see me standing staring out from the distance,
Hear my cry if you'd only listen...
Out of focus, into me and you

And it hurts me so bad to deny it, oooh
These feelings are out of control.
Do you know what it's like to want something so bad...
And then having to let it go?
And it hurts me to know that this time in our lives...
So soon will be in the past
And you spend it pretending your playing it cool.
Never knowing,
Never knowing,
Never knowing what,
Never knowing what we should've been.

Tell me who should I be to make you love me?
Tell me what does it mean to be alone?
You've got me wondering if I'm good enough.
Pretty enough, giving enough, special enough

Tell me who should I be to make you love me?
Who should I be? Who should I be? Ooooh...
To make you love me?
Who should I be? Who should I be? Ooooh...
To make you love me?
Who should I be? Who should I be? Ooooh...
To make you love me.........?

~FeFe Dobson – Kiss me Fool

mood: crushed

For your veiwing pleasure, #3!

I won't talk
I won't breathe
I won't move till you finally see
That you belong with me

You might think I don’t look
But deep inside
In the corner of my mind
I’m attached to you
I’m weak
Its true
Cause I’m afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
Cause my heart keeps falling faster

I've waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
Its time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

You don’t know what you do
Every time you walk into the room
I’m afraid to move
I’m weak
Its true
I’m just scared to know the ending
Do you see me too?
Do you even know u met me?

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
Its time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

I know when I go ill be on my way to you
The way that’s true

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
Its time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

~Ryan Cabrera - True

mood: crushed

For your veiwing pleasure, #4!

I almost got drunk at school at 14
Where I almost made out with the homecoming queen
Who almost went on to be miss Texas
But lost to a slut with much bigger breastes
I almost dropped out to move to LA
Where I was almost famous for almost a day

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost loved you
I almost wished you would've loved me too

I almost held up a grocery store
Where I almost did 5 years and then 7 more
Cause I almost got popped for a fight with a thug
Cause he almost made off with a bunch of the drugs
That I almost got hooked on cause you ran away
And I wish I woulda had the nerve to ask you to stay

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost had you
And I didn't even know it

You kept me guessing and now I'm destined
to spend my time missing you
I almost wish you would've loved me too

Here I go thinking about all the things I could've done
I'm gonna need a forklift cause all the baggage weighs a ton
I know we had our problems I can't remember one

I almost forgot to say something else
And if I cant fit it in I'll keep it all to myself
I almost wrote a song about you today
But I tore it all up and I threw it away

And I almost had you
But I guess that doesn't cut it
Almost had you
And I didn't even know it

You kept me guessing and now I'm destined
to spend my time missing you
And I almost had you [x3]

I almost wish you would've loved me too

mood: tired

I'm reading your note over again
There's not a word that I comprehend,
Except when you signed it
"I will love you always and forever."

You've been asking me to bleed.
It seems these kinds of questions
They come too easy to you now.
Your lack of shame comes naturally.
I should not be surprised.
I should have seen it sooner.

Continually failing these trials
but you stand by me nonetheless
and you won't let me sink
though I'm beggin you, I'm begging you

You're not so happy.
You're not secure.
You're dying to look cute in your blue jeans,
but you're plastic just like everyone.

Close lipped
another goodnight kiss
is robbed of all it's passion,
your grip
another time, is slack
it leaves me feeling empty.

I want to give you
whatever you need.
What is it you need?
Is it what I need?
I want to give you
whatever you need.
What is it you need?
Is it within me?

I'm starting to fashion an idea in my head
where I would impress you
and every single word I said.
Would come out insightful or brave or smooth or charming
and you'd want to call me

I'm dying to know
do you do you like dreaming of things
so impossible or only the practical

My hopes are so high,
that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me,
so I die happy.

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself